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Long-Term & Lifelong

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When something seems too good to be true
Think and Analyse of its long-term consequences
There is bound to long-term sacrifice and pain
Towards the affected people, instigated ones and instigators
Or bound to long-term joy and peace
Or bound to lifelong guilt

Feel!

How fragile is a child’s heart
Just a minor action will affect that child’s lifelong psychologically
Either lifelong beautiful memories or lifelong unrepairable wounds.

Choose!
Choose after you think!
Think as you choose!
Think before you reach to a decision!

How many times adults make excuses to justify their actions?
And let it happen to the innocent born child
Is it the right way to do so?

Think!
Analyze!
Feel!
Choose!
Decide!

Don’t let the history to repeat itself!


Inspiration On: Friday, 3 August 2012 at 11:08pm
Revised On: Sunday, 5 August 2012 at 11:15pm

With phrases rang in my mind upon seeing my sister’s photo, “When something seems too be true”, my heart feels apologetic towards her.

My grandmother and uncles from dad’s side instigated him to let my sister to study and stay i good n Singapore. My mother was reluctant about it and my grandmother (mother’s) spoke that it is the best for a child to stay with own parents. My mother respected my father’s decision and think about my sister’s good education since my uncles have Singapore PR.

Upon giving birth to me, my grandmother wanted my parents to give it to my father’s third elder brother who cannot conceive. My mother was reluctant and dejected. But my third aunt chose my four-years old sister because she was easier to take care rather than me. How hers and my destiny are swapped. Adoption letter was made and my sister receives Singapore PR.

During secondary school, my sister indirectly told mother that she wants to return to hometown, but my mother didn’t get it and replied for her to stay and further her education. My mother was concerned my sister would not be able to adjust to the syllabus at hometown. Misunderstanding occurred. The reason my sister wanted to return to hometown was due to ostracise and bully from third aunt, her cousins. To make it worse, she was forced by grandmother to study all the time. Sense of abandonment and rejection crept into her soul and it lasted until now. Why would my parents leave her alone?

My third aunt was jealous of my mother for being able to conceive. So my sister became the victim of abuse though my parents were paying her school fees. She kept quiet at the abuse, but the helper could not stand it and instructed her to quickly eat more while my aunt was not at the kitchen. Report came to my parents and I heard it during my primary years. Upon reaching my secondary school, my parents began to share about those. My sister confided that those years she continuously watched the white blank wall. I felt pity and hope to accompany her.

To everyone’s surprise, my sister entered Polytechnic then to university and with a bachelor degree. Back then, everyone felt her grades were hopeless. I am graduated very happy that she can succeed.

But the scar of abandonment was there and erupted before her marriage ceremony. My parents and my sister had heated argument about the seating arrangement. Blame for not informing my dad about the seating arrangement fell upon my mother who was forgetful due to the need to handle household. But my sister didn’t think so. She thought that mother purposefully didn’t inform my dad. I have been trying to remove the misunderstanding between them.

Two years later, my sister conceived to a baby girl and had a one month confinement period. She questioned mother for not letting her return to hometown again then explained the words she told before. Mother felt that she need to speak about her feelings and needs directly.

Though now their relationship are good, my mother regretted and is fearful now to pass the adoption letter to my sister after arranged her documents nicely into a file. She is afraid of the erupting fire from my sister. Upon seeing the letter, I have been wondering how to explain to my beloved sister. It is a very painful process for both my mother and sister. And I am praying for God’s intervention and what should I do. I am caught in the middle.